Tonight, after a long day of work; after the dishes and laundry were done, and my husband was happily parked in front of the big screen TV watching basketball, I run a hot bath and stepped into paradise-- just me, bubbles, and a few candles-- in perfect, quiet, bliss. It's my happy place.
Before I could finish my first sigh of relaxation, my husband was knocking on the door with a game score update.
My second attempt to relax was interrupted by the phone ringing. My husband swings the door open and hands me the phone. I shiver from the cold draft. It's a political telemarketer! Apparently, hubby dear, is unable to screen calls.
Third try-- The neighbor kid calls selling chocolate bars for school. Then my mother calls.
Fourth go 'round-- He's baaaccckkk asking if we have any ice cream-- as if ice cream would be somewhere other than in the freezer-- where he is perfectly capable of checking for himself.
Beat it buster!
At last-- finally, peace and quiet. The water is barely warm. I close my eyes and....
"Hey honey, are we busy three weeks from Tuesday to have dinner with the kids?"
For the record, I do not, nor have I ever, taken my calender into the bathtub. And while we're at it, "the kids" he's referring to are grown women probably trying to take a hot bath at that very moment.
Get me a sharp object so I can end my misery!
At this point, I'm turning into a prune, the water is cold, the bubbles dissolved and my head aches.
I turn on more hot water in an attempt to salvage my sanctuary. You see, a long, hot, bubble bath is my escape from all things stressful; a way to relax my tired body and clear my throbbing head. I do not like company in the bathtub, the bathroom or even that side of the house when I'm bathing. I just want to be alone.
My husband is at the door again. Apparently I'd been in the bathtub for so long he asked if I was okay?
I'll be out as soon as I finish calculating my alimony payments.
Defeated, I pulled my soggy self up out of the tub and got dressed to join my husband in front of the TV--
At which point he had absolutely nothing to say to me.
Welcome to TheFiftyFactor.com - Joanna