A woman trying hard to turn back the hands of time, actually needing an alarm clock around her neck to remind her what time it is, has to be one of the all time worst jokes ever played on a menopausal woman. So where's Ashton Kutcher? I want to slap him silly.
The problem is, lately I seem to have lost all sense of time. It just flies by and the next thing I know it's dinner time... or Wednesday... or Memorial Day... or the party is today, not tomorrow--at our house! Throw in those gawd awful "menopause moments" when my brain is like a black hole and well, I feel like I'll be a scattered mess until the end of time.
But today I found a life-saving invention! Think alarm clock on a rope. My new discovery is a wind up timer, that's on a chain, to hang around my neck, so I'm never at a loss for time again!
These days I'm time-phobic so I bought five of them. Count 'em FIVE of them! They're a bright, lemon yellow color and tick, tick, tick so loud it's easy to keep track of time. The best part is, when my desired time is up, the alarm RRRRRINGS so loud it could wake the dead. Now there's no way I can miss a single minute!
Trust me, I will not wear the alarm around my neck when I leave the house. I'd sound like a crazy ticking time bomb and in this day and age I could land in the slammer. But I do have one in my car in case I arrive somewhere before I'm actually supposed to be there. I'll set the timer so I'm not late, even though I'm already early.
Time's up, gotta go.
Welcome to TheFiftyFactor.com - Joanna