Monday, January 9, 2012

And Then I Said "Duh".... and GIVEAWAY

I told you about the recent robberies in my neighborhood in this post and how I was wearing every piece of jewelry I own so as not to make it easy for the @#$%^&! robbers to steal my loot.

Well... That's not all I did. I became very proactive and, in addition to blasting dvds featuring loud barking pooches to trick would be robbers into thinking I had a house full of attack dogs, I also bought a big red lock for the side gate that leads to our back yard. My thinking was that anything to slow down the bad guys was a good thing.

I picked a big bright red lock for our 6 foot high gate-- The new gate we had custom made last summer that was bigger, stronger and more secure than our old 6 foot high gate. We thought the robberies were a good reason to finally get a good lock. The red color was selected because it really stood out on the white fence and seemed more serious looking then the others.

Truly, my red lock made me feel so much safer that I've actually left the house a few time without an annoying dog movie blasting.

I knew the lock would be a problem for the gardener so I was on top of things and made sure he had a key so he could come and go as needed. But, I forgot about the pool guy who comes once a week.

Oophs.

So yesterday, several weeks after the purchase of my big strong lock, I called our pool guy-- A lovely man who's been servicing our pool for the past 12 years. I never know when he works but I know he does because the pool sparkles 365 days a year-- I've always assumed he came the same time the gardener did because they're friends.

The pool guy was so sweet and actually seemed happy to hear from me. What I didn't realize when I called his cell phone was that he was actually on our property cleaning the pool-- A day the gardener was not at our house. Strange because I hadn't given him a key to our new "security gate".

What the heck?!?!? Had someone forgotten to lock the gate? Or gawd forbid, was the big red lock broken?

I wish!

The pool guy simply stepped around the "security gate"-- WITH his very long cleaning pole, gigantic hose and a bunch of chemicals in a bucket.

WTH?

So I went outside and took a long hard look at my new security gate and realized it was a complete and total joke-- A fake "security gate", useless other than to hide the garbage cans. Even I could step around it and I'm old and afraid of heights.


The big strong gate is attached to a cement wall with three large steps to help would-be robbers, and nice pool guys, up and over into the back yard! It's not secure AT ALL!


Did I mention we've lived here for 18 years and never noticed what a joke the gate was?

Did I mention that we paid $400 to have the new big strong gate built for "security reasons"?

Did I mention that the guy who sold me the gate kept a straight face when he discussed the "big strong security gate" with me?

Did I mention how stupid I feel?

Needless to say, the red security lock is a total waste and gone... But the dog dvds continues to play over and over and over.

Welcome to www.TheFiftyFactor.com - Joanna Jenkins
Don't forget to enter my GIVEAWAY for a $25 Visa Gift Card and two copies of Enjoy Every Sandwich. Click HERE to Enter.
Photo Credit: © baurka - Fotolia.com

43 comments:

Cloudia said...

LOL
diagnosis: HUMAN!



Aloha from Waikiki
Comfort Spiral

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Webster said...

Perhaps you could try to negotiate with the gate guy to add a little extra security to his not so securely designed gate. Clever pool cleaner, and clever thieves notice these things a lot better than we innocents.

Bernie said...

Oh Joanna I am sorry but I did laugh as I went through something similar a few years ago. You are not stupid, you just believed what he told you. I am sure you will be fine.....:-)Hugs

Cinner said...

Joanna, dear lord what a pickle. It drives me crazy when we can not feel safe in the house. when I go away I always am afraid I will come back to find a break in, Hoping you get this fixed....I do like the idea of the dog tapes, that would be enough for me. ....Hugs.

Betty said...

hahahahahaha, sorry but I can´t stop smiling. That would be one for my "most embarrassing moments". I´m so glad I´m not the only one having things like that happen to me.

P.S. Thanks for always coming by my blog and commenting. I love your support and wish you the best for the New Year!

Mari said...

Aaaggh! Sounds like something I might do. It did make me laugh, I must admit.
The dog tapes are a great idea though!

SueAnn said...

Oh dear!!! Ha!! Now that would be so funny but DUH!! I would have probably done the very same thing!!
Hugs
SueAnn

PⒿ @ $ € € ₦$ ₣®0₥... said...

I've had plenty of realizations after the fact. How awful to be taken by the gate salesman,but what a blessing to discover the problem when no robbery had taken place! Oy.

DJan said...

It certainly did make me smile, thinking about the big red lock, the gap between the gate and the wall, and the barking dog tape. All smile worthy. Fortunately you are still foiling them somehow. :-)

diane said...

Poor Joanna.
At least your gate is white, mine used to be white, now it's just peeling. It doesn't even keep out whatever it is that tears apart my trash.
Number one thing that keeps someone from entering your house: A radio. Isn't that weird? But it's true. Love the barking dog idea though. You could always switch it up with gunshots & screaming, they'll be running away from your house. Oh, and maybe the sound of chainsaws and maniacal laughter.

Jeanie said...

I agree with PJ, it is a good thing you discovered the glitch before a robbery instead of because a robbery.
I still have to laugh about you walking around laden with all of your jewels.

Suldog said...

Joanna, we all have those "D'Oh!" moments in our lives. Don't let it get you down.

(Here is where I should tell you about a similar moment I had, to make you feel better. Unfortunately, I can't come up with one off the top of my head, but rest assured I've had them. I think the reason I can't come up with one right away is because there are so many from which to choose!)

jane said...

hahaha! hey you can borrow coco if you want. but only if she can use the pool. ;)
x

Eva Gallant said...

OMG! That is too funny!

Tammy said...

Please don't hate me for laughing -I was laughing with you not at you as I'd do the same dog gone thing I'm sure. The thing is we don't think like robbers so who knew. Luckily now you do know - I think you should go smack the guy who sold you the gate upside the head however. Keep wearing all your jewelry my friend. Hugs!!

CiCi said...

At least now you know and have the option to make some sort of improvement or just let it go. Some people have security cameras on the their roofs so at least you would have a nice video to watch if a burglar did get in.
Actually, break-ins in your neighborhood are not a joking matter and do tend to make you nervous. You think you are doing all you can but there is usually something more you can do. Police departments used to have enough personnel to go to peoples homes to inspect and advise. But I think there are companies who do that now.

Green Girl in Wisconsin said...

I'm laughing because I see how when you're around something all the time, you fail to realize/see/understand it!

Kristina P. said...

Ha! At least it was the pool guy before the bad guys!

Hilary said...

I think Cloudia's comment nails it.. Human. Though the company that installed it HAD to know better.

Brian Miller said...

smiles....and how long has it kept you safe jj? i think you will be alright..funny...

Taradharma said...

a complete 'doh!' moment, Joanna. That security gate guy ought to be run out of town on a rail...

Lisalulu said...

if only we can all learn from YOU

Nezzy said...

Heehehehee!!! I'm rollin' here 'cause I'm thinkin' that if we had gaps in our fences 'round here we'd have wild~eye cattle roamin' everywhere. Your too stinkin' funny girl!

I does look like to pros would of devised a plan to close the gap!

God bless ya Hon and stay safe!!!

'Hope ya don't get back trouble luggin' all those 'jewels around. :o)

Christine said...

It's terrible having to lock everything up, or try to!

ladyfi said...

Oh dear!

Darn those big security gates that are fake. Well, at least you can now get yourself a real good gate?

Cathy Clementz said...

oh!!! How funny!!! I needed that laugh this a.m. Still don't have internet connection in our RV so at the govt computer trying to catch up!

Joyce said...

Oh dear... I at least hope you have that powder stuff I see on CSI where you can at least get an imprint of the robbers shoes. However, my first choice is you won't ever have to use that powder stuff. I bet your red lock would be cool to hang in the house as a decor conversational piece. What do you think? Hugs my friend. xo

Mike Smith said...

Oh, dear JJ!

King of New York Hacks said...

Ha!! always puttin a smile on my face JJ...I think we all overso it with security sometimes...but if it makes us FEEL safe, I'm in :-)

Formerly known as Frau said...

Omg....sorry I'm giggling just a little only because I'd do the same thing....! Yikes! Get a beware of large dog sign for the gate!

Holly said...

I don't feel sorry for you. I gave you the best answer for these security issues. I told you, all you need do, is pay for my plane ticket and I would come there and stand at the door or this very tricky gate and bark and foam at the mouth all day long. I need Friday nights off, though.

Joanna Jenkins said...

OMG Holly, I am laughing so hard. I love you girl!
xo jj

Gran said...

Totally sounds like something I would do!

Attila the Mom said...

Oh gosh, I'm sorry for laughing, but this is something I would miss as well!

deb colarossi said...

I would have totally made the same mistake.

Chris H said...

OMG I just had to laugh!
Too, too funny.
You COULD build an additional fence to the right of the existing one? WITHOUT steps.

Shrinky said...

Hahaha, oh I know I shouldn't laugh, not really, but girl, that is sooooo funny, I just can't help it! Poor baby (hugs), that's EXACTLY the kind of thing I tend to do, too, you are not alone, believe me.

Unknown Mami said...

Well, now you know.

Heather said...

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Barbara Shallue said...

Oh, I've had more of those moments than I want to remember!!

JillsyGirl said...

Oh, Joanna, that is truly priceless!!

RNSANE said...

Well, you must have been doing something right all these years since, thus far, I believe your belongings have been secure.

I know the man who sold you your security gate is very happy as well.

Maybe you need to rig something up outside so attack dogs bark in different locations at different times....maybe you need a real attack dog. Ah, such is life in the big city.

Michelle said...

*giggle*

I am allowed to giggle, right? This is such proof positive that it's all about our perspective in security and not reality one more time :)